Universal Human Needs

Stephen Reiss identified sixteen universal needs as a result of surveying thousands of people. Before I'd ever heard of Stephen Reiss's work I wrote about my needs like this: "To be heard. To be seen. To be valued, cared for, thought of. I crave people because I crave my own existence, and I feel my own breathing, resounding reality best when others affirm its reality with their response. I don't need my friends to agree with me. I don't need them to come at my beck and call. But I do need them to truly see me for who I am, value me for who I am, and care about my feelings."
When I read Reiss's work, I was a little confused where my desperate need to be seen fell into it. I believe this comes under his category of "acceptance" which is described as "the need to be appreciated." But I wouldn't use those words to describe it at all. Merely being accepted doesn't mean I was understood. And merely being told "I appreciate it," when I do something nice for someone doesn't cause me to feel fulfilled.
Would Reiss put my need to feel seen under "social contact" or "social status"? Simply being in contact with others doesn't make them understand me. In fact, simple contact with others often leaves me feeling more lonely and isolated than ever because it proves to me how difficult a task it is to be authentic and simultaneously be socially conscientious. And while I find social status – significance – to be something else I crave, I find it hard to imagine that being understood falls under the scope of being significant. I could have social significance as an incredible painter of great skill who makes beautiful paintings without a single person ever understanding my paintings!
If we assume that Reiss had the final say on what all the universal needs of humans are, we could then assume that my personal desire to be understood is not a universal need . . . But with so many people feeling chronically lonely, closed-up, shut-out, shut-off, and isolated, I think it is fair to say that people are craving deep, vulnerable connection that I'm craving. That said, the list you'll find below has many overlaps with Reiss's list, but is modified based on my own research:
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When reading, the most incredible things I've ever learned came from stories. Stories are more memorable. They create images and time-lines in our minds. They give us all the background information that lead up to a great moment, a great realization, a great break-through.
In reality, we only truly grasp ("grok") something through personal experience. We can not add to our experience through reading dry data. But we really can and do add to our experience with stories. The more detailed, authentic, and dynamic the story, the more there is for us to learn from it. The more it resonates with us and touches us, the more we retain what we've learned.
It is because of this that I'm writing my own life as a series of autobiographical novels. If this interests you, please sign up at left and visit my patreon page for exclusive access to my personal revelations, diary entries and autobiographical novels as I'm writing them. You'll also get a lot of other awesome perks, which you can read about here: www.patreon.com/Raederle.